Brunansky's Blog

“Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.”

-Epicurus (A Dead Ancient Greek Philosopher)

There’s something curious about death. Throughout the world, different cultures and different religions all have their own unique way of dealing with individuals who have passed on.

Passed on to where?

That depends on your beliefs. I’m not here to preach my beliefs to any of you. I acknowledge that as much as I believe what it is I believe, you do the same. I hope that whatever you choose to believe provides you that which is necessary for you to enjoy each day you are alive. That all being said, in an effort to examine, without prejudice, to the best of my/our collective abilities, “death,” we must find common ground. Let’s begin by agreeing that death is waiting for each of us.

How morbid!

Calm down. This won’t be a depressing post. Let’s move on…

If you’re wondering, why on a Saturday night I’m pontificating death, the answer is simple. The majority of my day was spent in a “celebration of life” for an old family friend. For the unaware, a “celebration of life” is simply a funeral that aims to focus more on the glory and splendor of being alive than the passing on of the loved one. In short, less tears, more anecdotes and fond memories. I do not exaggerate my time spent in this celebration. The widow asked if I would film the ceremony so that she would have a keepsake of the memorial. I said yes. I arrived early, set up my camera gear, filmed the event, went to the reception that followed, and have been editing the video. In fact, as I write this, I’m currently waiting for Final Cut to finish running edits (that take considerable time) in the background. It’s also worth noting that it is well past my bed time.  My apologies, in advance, for any ramblings.

So what is it about death that leaves us flustered?

Mark Twain said, “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.” This suggests that those who look towards the end of their lives with trepidation do so, because, deep down inside, they haven’t dared to live in such a way that they would feel accomplished.  They aren’t afraid of dying. They fear dying before their personal goals of life are fulfilled. And long before Mr. Twain wrote the great American novel, a roman emperor believed a very similar philosophy. Marcus Aurelius said, “It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.” The contrast here is that Emperor Aurelius believes men should fear death less than never truly being alive. It is a far worse thing to die long before your death in a life you chose to treat with such indifference (in his mind). So, between both of these men, it seems that humanity has nothing to fear of death, instead, they should take action to feel alive so when death finally arrives, they might great her with a welcomed smile.

But Jeremy, what if, by living a life of fulfillment, our passions in this life prevent us from an enjoyable life in the hereafter?

I suppose I’d be curious as to what pleasures you need to experience that would leave you feeling fulfilled in this life but damning you in the next. Lao Tzu said, “Life and death are one thread, the same line viewed from different sides.” So, to be in balance, a life of fulfillment here would, in theory, lead to a fulfilled after life. If everything is the same thread, then what is good here will be good there, would it not? If we look to Christianity we see a similar belief. Matthew 18:18, “Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.” This, again, continues the notion that we are more than what is done while we are here.

Ok Jeremy, but how do we find fulfillment?

Now we’re cooking! It’s my personal belief that we find fulfillment in this life by doing that which we are destined to do. And in so doing, we are able to help others find their calling, whatever it might be. To quote Elton John, “It’s the circle of life.” Some people are called to a life of service. We might find them in the military, or policing or firefighting, religious clerics or government. In these occupations, they protect and guide the future allowing others to focus on what it is that makes them feel alive. It provides the opportunities to ask and answer how they might find fulfillment. Maybe, they’re called to create. These artists bring to the world new works of art or technologies (or both), to help shape new possibilities for the future. We might see them as painters, musicians, scientists, engineers, actors, or film creators. The artist, through their art, might help someone answer a question about their life they haven’t even thought to ask, and as a result, the emotional baggage is relieved and they can move forward into their lives renewed. I’m sure you’re thinking of a song or film right now that gave you some type of emotional epiphany. Also, technology that relieves burdens from people to better shape their lives. Perhaps your life is on hold because you need a car, but, thanks to scientists and engineers living a fulfilled life, you’re able to ride a light rail or train to work. Maybe you can use a computer and teleconference from home. These scientific breakthroughs all help us move our lives forward because of those living their best lives. Or maybe, you’re an incredible communicator. You can speak with almost anyone and through your calling of conversation, you’re able to help them rediscover or remove something in their life that is blocking their ability to answer their call. President Reagan said, “Let us ask ourselves, ‘What kind of people do we think we are?’ And let us answer, ‘Free people, worthy of freedom and determined not only to remain so but to help others gain their freedom as well.” It’s possible he didn’t mean a life is freed once it’s answering its calling, but, still, the core of his statement rings true to this writing.

You’ve said a lot, Jeremy. So, to sum it up, death is normal and we shouldn’t fear death as long as we’re living our lives with a sense of purpose and fulfillment that will in turn help others find their purpose and calling? 

Yup. You nailed it. Now, get out there and create, or guide, or counsel, or lead, or build, or do whatever it is that your life is calling you to do. If you aren’t living well, you probably aren’t helping others live well. And I know that you wouldn’t want to deliberately hurt anyone. So, live a fulfilled life. This way, you’re also doing a service for others. And maybe, one day, we’ll all hold hands and sing “The Circle of Life” together. We probably won’t in all realism but it was a fun thought to have, if only for a moment. 

I’d like to close with the Bible verse that the pastor opened the “celebration of life” with today. Now before you tune out, and get hot under the collar and start clutching your pearls, you’ve read quotes from a Greek philosopher, an American novelist, a roman emperor, a Chinese philosopher, a British songwriter and an American President. If you aren’t religious this should carry as much weight as the rest of this writing. If you aren’t religious it might also give you insight into how your Christian and/or religious friends view life. So, if that’s the case, you’re welcome. I, of course, am leading with the assumption all the people you associate with don’t view life through the same lens you do. I hope that’s the case, anyway. This planet is a big place with lots of perspectives. Soak em up, folks.

Alright Jeremy… let’s wrap this up…

Today, I witnessed the celebration of man’s life who was devoted to his wife, his church and his community. And today, it was a celebration because of his spiritual beliefs. And so, the pastor began by reading a verse from 1st Thessalonians, “For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.” It’s safe to say that the man whose memory we celebrated lived a fulfilled life. The kind words spoke about his impact and influence on family, friends and colleagues resonated truth to this belief. And it was an honor and privilege to record and edit the memorial video for his widowed wife.

May the life you live be fulfilled. May the fulfillment of your life inspire those around you to answer their calling. May you never eat bad sushi. And may you find, at the end, all you hoped you’d find.

Stay fresh, folks. I’ve got more life to live and I hope to see you on the other side when all is said and done.

Cheers,

JB.