Brunansky's Blog

It’s been a peculiar few years. A notification alerted me that my writers anniversary on this website has come and gone. In June I hit the 8 year mark. I cannot believe it’s been 8 years of blogging on and off on WordPress. My writing has consisted of the non-professional, enthusiast who has a thought and decides to type it out for the internet to potentially read. I say “non-professional” because I have not made any money on this website. It has been a place for me to write, to share and possibly make readers think with a different perspective.

Over the course of 8 years, I have shared short think pieces to a published book. I have shared thoughts on films. I’ve shared the films I personally made. I even share some of my photography. I think the only artistic endeavour that hasn’t been shared on this website is my music. To be fair, I was either performing, producing or engineering the songs. They were not mine alone to share.

But here we are… 8 years later. I’ve learned a lot in 8 years. Some of the things I’ve learned I have written about here on this website. Some of the things I’ve shared over drinks, meals, workouts, at pool halls, bars, churches, coffee shops, pretty much anywhere that people hang out and talk. It’s been an unorthodox educational experience over 8 years, I will say that. And here I sit, typing away on yet another keyboard.

Tonight, I have no agenda. I wasn’t prepared to write anything this evening. I simply saw that I had an anniversary of 8 years. Perhaps that alone warrants time to write. Since I am writing now, clearly that must be the case. Typically, I am at the gym working out; however, tonight is a rest night. I suppose that is another sign that I should write. So let’s dive into my mind and see what can be discovered on a Wednesday evening in August, 8 years later.

Modern life is evolving. The past four years have shown me that in a day, even if you are unaware, life changes. In writing narrative stories you might hear the narrator alude to dramatic change by saying, “…little did he know.” It’s ominous. It tells us that something important will happen, either good or bad, never indifferent. This day of change can be as simple as getting a promotion, getting fired or finding out you’re about to be a parent but you weren’t planning (or maybe you were) for such news. It’s a crossroad. Life takes a sudden, immediate detour from the path you were on. For me, that occured on June 5th, 2017. I didn’t realize it at the time. However, all signs point to that date being the pivot of my life and I still don’t know why.

My life has followed a path. It’s been crooked, curvy, round about, twisted, up and down, sideways, backwards but a path all the same. Then June 5th 2017 happened and life got weird. Life got weird in the sense that it was weird for someone who has been in the arts his entire life. So, my gauge of “weird” is probably different than yours. There’s short dialogue in Mel Brooks “The Producers” where Max and Leo are talking about how things are going. Leo mentions something about the situation getting out of hand and Max is quick to interject and correct him on how typical the situation is for the entertainment industry. Later, Max admits to Leo that now, during a different circumstance, things are officially out of hand even for the entertainment industry. That is how the last couple years have felt for me. Something unexplainably weird is going on… even for my life.

The most normal thing I have going for me at the moment I would not have considered normal four years ago. In fact, four years ago, I probably would’ve cracked jokes at my own expense. Now, four years into the bizarre, it’s the most normal thing going and I’m enjoying it. The more typical aspects of my life have faded away, similar to many relationships. That is part of growing up though, growing apart. I used to be surrounded by familiar faces everywhere I went. Now, the most familiar faces I see are at the gym. There’s a few ladies and a couple dudes that share a similar workout schedule. Plus, some of the workers have been there consistently over the course of the last couple years. I have had a few contract jobs during this time where I saw the same people consistently for a few months. But other than that, I’ve got some folks at the gym, and one other new person.

I’ve been single, sober and celibate for at least four years. My dog was killed. I was given another puppy for Christmas. Her name is Rey (yes, like Rey from “Star Wars”). She’s officially just over a year old. She has been a constant source of happiness and joy. And she enjoys road trips, which is great news. She enjoys the beach but enjoys chasing the people, the pets and the birds more. She is the first dog I’ve owned that enjoys playing fetch. She chases her tail. She barks at dogs on the television. She has tried to drink water from the toilet. She is a proper dog and the first one that I have ever owned. It’s great. She’s great.

I was unemployed for four years. I applied for hundreds of jobs. Literally, hundreds of jobs without exageration and got less than 5 interviews in 4 years. I had a couple short term contract jobs that only lasted a couple months each. I made three short films. I wrote a book. I am in the best shape of my life because of the dedication to fitness and my doctor just gave me a clean bill of health the other day after my physical. Outside of that, life has been very bizarre and I still do not know why or why it has persisted for so many years.

So what have I learned? It’s been unarguably the worst four years of my life. And just so weird. After 8 years of writing on here. I guess I’ve learned that when life gets bizarre and you can’t find a friend you can always find yourself. And hopefully you have enough strength to make it through the darkness to some sort of light. Even if that light is from someone online. Oh, you should also have a goal! Like for me, getting paid, getting out of America and sailing is a goal. I cannot wait to be on ship, far from an American shoreline sailing to new and exciting beaches I have only seen on a screen. The past 8 years have taught me much. The past four years have revealed more. And I still have no idea why.

So, I guess, in closing, keep your chin up and do some chin ups. I don’t know. It’s a wild ride that hasn’t made any sense but every evening ends with a sunrise. I look forward to my sunrise and all the new adventures I will have. Man, the past four years have been so weird. Thanks for following along these past 8 years. And here’s to however many years of writing we have together.

Cheers.

-JB

PS: Excuse any spelling errors. This was all done freeform. Welcome to the raw writers room. It can get messy.